Britain's Got Heroes!
Welcome to BRITAIN’S GOT HEROES!
The search is on for Britain’s Next Top Superhero!
Will it be…..?
- The Green Scimitar – a Muslim hero for a multicultural society! Leeds-born Khalid admits he’s “a modern man who loves the ladies”, but there’s no doubting his values or his faith. “God got me this far and, Inshallah, He’ll take me all the way!” The Green Scimitar is a well known neighbourhood protector in Bradford and a welcome sight watching over Friday night revelers at taxi ranks.
- Purl Gran – old enough to know better! One of our senior contestants, 67-year-old Eileen Jukes knits up a storm and her needles are the only weapon she needs. “I start off just picking up litter round our streets, but I think everyone needs a gran looking out for them.” Eileen gives up her beloved bingo evenings to stop littering and vandalism in Basildon.
- Hősök – it’s Hungarian for ‘Hero’! All the way from Budapest, Lazlo Varga has already been a big hit in Germany, where he beat Morgenmann (“Mr Tomorrow”) in the finals. He wants to win the British BGH because “Britain is the land of heroes and I want to be reconised as one!” Good luck, Hősök!
- The Crutch – his weakness is his strength! 16-year-old Jackie Danforth is only just old enough to enter the competition, but his main setback was losing his legs in a traffic accident when he was just 6. “I don’t let disability define me,” he says, “I’m a hero first and handicapped second!”
- Street Princess – the girl next door mixes it up! 19-year-old Patrisha Ayoade of Plaistow in East London started in the Newham Nightz, a dance collective that doubled as costumed heroes. Now going solo, Patrisha would like to follow her idol Sheneen’s career, from crime-fighting into a singing star.
Your Judging Panel
|Niven McQuarrie||Sheneen Leblanc||Letitia Dirk||Macsen Simonside|
|The former Captain Psychedelic||We first knew her as BlaZe Star||AKA Lolly Blade||The one-time Simon Magus|
|Britain’s biggest post-war superhero and the only surviving member of Flower Power, now a national treasure||She shot to fame as a superhero sex symbol, but a megastar singing and acting career beckoned: now she’s coaching the next generation||The voice of Eighties super-protest and still an outspoken feminist, Letitia will not be holding back with her views||The suave stage magician who became a crime fighter and Britain’s first man on the moon: this is his show, but can he mentor this year’s winner?|
What they’re saying
“I can tell that, with this panel of judges and these contestants, we’re set to see some of the best superheroes yet” – Macsen Simonside
“No midriff baring tops, no chainmail bikinis, no stiletto heel boots – I want to see some super heroines who can fight crime, not pose for pictures” – Letitia Dirk
“Man, superpowers were pretty far it in the Sixties, but I say they can be farer and outer and farer outer in 2010… sorry 2013” – Nevin McQuarrie
“Just so long as I get to mentor the girls!” – Sheneen Leblanc
“Studies show that neighbourhoods protected by costumed heroes show a 8-10% drop in crime rates over 12 months. That’s good community solutions and if BGH brings us more heroes, I’m all in favour of it!” – Lemuel Cassidy MP, Home Secretary
“It’s regrettable that my old sparring partner Simon Magus is still promoting masked vigilantism when this country now recognizes Costumed Villainy Syndrome as a mental illness, not a crime. Simon’s show is about a cure for a problem that doesn’t exist” – Eric Finnian (the former costumed villain ‘Conundrum’), spokesman for “Care – Not Crusaders”
“Scripture speaks plainly, that signs and wonders are the beginning of the End Times and seals are being broken as we stand here. Jesus Christ is the only superhero and masked costumes are the uniform of Antichrist!” – Deborah Gee-Holmes, secretary of the Pale Horse Evangelical Outcry